Yesterday, I found myself in the backseat of a car, holding Jasmine as she sobbed into my shoulder. Her tears left streaks on my black shirt, her nose running unceremoniously.

Yesterday, we buried her mother, who had fought a heart disease for five years and lost. In these moments, life seems to cast me as the resilient one, and I played that role, staying silent, my face a mask of stoicism while I embraced her. Yet, her grief was palpable, vibrating from her to me, reminding me of our shared pain.

Desperate to escape the weight of the moment, I let my mind wander through the car window, searching for any happy memory. Instead, I found myself recalling the first time I really heard Jasmine—the first big fight we had. It was before her mother’s illness became severe, back when Jasmine still seemed unaware of how precious—and precarious—our time with loved ones is.

That day, she stormed into my flat, furious and tearful, complaining about her mother’s lack of appreciation for her efforts.  She vented, wondering aloud why older adults dismiss younger perspectives, claiming all the wisdom for themselves. I had no answers, only silence, giving her space to air her frustrations.

Reflecting on that memory now, I wish I had said something—anything—to calm the storm in her heart  before she blurted out those regrettable words: “I wish she would just die so I can see road.”

Her words shattered the moment and set off our heated argument. Suddenly, I found myself throwing her own questions back at her, each one landing like a blow. At the time, I told myself I was stopping her from saying something she’d regret. What I didn’t admit was how jealous I felt—not just of her close relationship with her mother but of the conflict itself, something I’d lost when I lost my own mother.

Yesterday, as Jasmine wept in my arms, I wondered which of my silent wishes the universe had heard first.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Dumebi Favour is a passionate Nigerian writer and avid reader who finds inspiration in poetry, captivating books and engaging company. She is currently on a creative exploration to find the forms of writing that resonate the most with her.